315 Lipsticks

Yes, I have 315 lipsticks. First of all, let me say that I am not posting this to brag. I am actually very ashamed of myself and am hoping that exposing my weirdness will somehow make me feel accountable to change.

Over the Labor Day weekend, I decided to tackle some organizing projects around the house. At the top of the list was organizing and cleaning out my lipstick collection. This collection has obviously grown to ginormous proportions. How did this happen? I have given it a lot of thought and this is what I came up with:

1. I blame my Mother. You know how your Mom always told you to clean your plate? Well she brainwashed me into not being wasteful and apparently it took really well because I have lipstick that I've had since High School! Sure they may smell funny and include colors like foil pink ala 80s Valley Girl, but they are perfectly full tubes of lipstick and it would be a shame to throw them in the trash!

2. It's my Dad's fault. My Dad is a well-known pack rat; therefore, I am genetically predisposed to hoard things.

3. Avon is Evil! The majority of my lipstick is from Avon - a whopping 93 tubes! If you hand me an Avon book I'm going to order something. Lipstick for $2.99? Give me one in every color! It's way too easy to order things you don't have to pay for at the moment.

4. Free Samples are from the Devil! Okay, I have 14 Clinique Lip Colors and I've never actually purchased a Clinique Lipcolor. Going back to number one, my Mother wouldn't like it if I carelessly tossed out a perfectly good lipstick I got for free!

Okay, so I got rid of 22 lipsticks over the weekend and am down to 293, but that is obviously not near enough. So here is my proclamation. I hereby promise that if I purchase another lipstick, I will get rid of 5 lipsticks. I will continue this process until I get down to 100 lipsticks. I will not falter or deviate from this plan. You are my witnesses. So help me God! Seriously, God help me!